Wednesday, August 04, 2010

MENTAL MOMENT: "You Cearly Dont Know Me" Struck a Cord!

"Ever Notice how 'What the hell' is always the right answer?" ~Marilyn Monroe

Today was another day i spent handling business and meditating on life. In the midst of my thoughts i looked up to see two friends arguing. About what? I'm not sure because really it wasn't my business. I just recall one friend repeating "You clearly don't know me!" The comment really struck a cord with me. Ive been on this Earth 28years and in the past two years i have lost two 'friends' (Ive only lost 3 in my entire life the other was to death) The other two Honestly i was more their friend because of their good personality, when i should've chosen them as friends based on their character. That was my mistake! It was something i realized in both situations way before the friendships fell apart. But what also started to play in my mind is the many times I've been told that i can make people uncomfortable. I don't know whats that's about. But hay, If you KNOW me you know I'm very quiet, non-chalant, blunt, i don't fight for attention; naturally i get it, i observe more than i talk, i know and accept who i am, good and bad, I'm confident in who i am and i could stare at the walls all day long with everything off and be content. Now most people would say 'That's not a problem'

"When it comes down to it, i let them think what they want. If they care enough to bother with what i do, them I'm already better than them anyways." ~Marilyn Monroe

I don't think its a problem but actually Ive realized it is! But only on Mondays and for certain types of personalities or character traits. Not to toot my own horn but I don't know anyone who knows me that doesn't like me. (Toot). Ive never fooled anyone into believing i was something or someone that I'm not. I haven't ever felt i needed to be in competition with anyone because Ive always been my own person. Yet at the same time, I'm made to feel as if i need to be someone else to make them comfortable. There have been many cases where i attempted to make people comfortable with who i was but i don't act very well! Faking just isn't my cup of tea. With that said Ive also noticed that the same 'people' who are uncomfortable with me also mimic me in various ways. I don't know if they realize I've noticed... Awkward moment.


"People had a habit of looking at me as if i were some kind of mirror instead of a person. They didn't see me, they saw their own lewd thoughts, then they white-masked themselves by calling me the lewd one." ~Marilyn Monroe

One thing I'm NOT or will EVER be is ashamed of who i am or apologetic about it. (I don't mind admitting when I'm in the wrong. Which is something different!) The argument however reminded me of one of inspirations; Marilyn Monroe. I've always been inspired by her because we have a lot in common and our thought processes are a bit similar, in ways. I remember one of her quotes and at that moment i realized that 'What the hell' is usually the best answer to questions. And for me the answer has been PEOPLE! Which is probably why I'm never shocked, moved, or overwhelmed by them. Which is both good and bad. With that blame it on being a Christian!

I didn't interrupt their argument, but to those two friends here's words of wisdom; "I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so you can appreciate them when they're right. You believe lies so eventually you learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."~Marilyn Monroe

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